Without Scars

Without Scars is on Amazon right now for $0.99 and Kindle Unlimited. It's a book I started before my extended break and I finished it during. I had a lot of fun writing it and it should be a fun weekend read. Enjoy. Thanks!

Un-retirement

I've been trying to figure out how to unretire for the last six months. I miss writing and I miss interacting with readers. So I guess this is my official announcement that I'm back? I needed to move away from it for a bit because it was kind of draining me and very exhausting. Anyway, I'm excited, and I'm glad to be back.

Failure to Launch excerpt

NOTE: IN UNEDITED GLORY!

“Nope. We’re not gonna do this. You’re not gonna drive yourself crazy. Come here.” Taking my hand, he led me into my bathroom and lifted me to sit on the countertop. He walked out and returned with a small black bag. Then Charlie pulled out a safety razor and shaving oil.

“Wait…you want me to…you’re trusting me to shave you?” I asked as he handed the razor to me. “Like, put a sharp instrument on your neck…where your pulse is beat—”

“Yes. I have to get ready. And guess what you won’t be worried about while you’re worried about possibly killing me?”

I laughed. Fair enough. “You want everything gone? ‘Cause I really like when it’s like this…” I cupped his face just to feel the stubble on my palms.

He smiled. “Okay. We’ll do that then. A little five o’clock shadow this time. But we gotta handle the neck beard.” He wet both his hand, pumped out shaving oil, and slathered it onto his neck. Then Charlie put his hands under my knees. I froze. “You probably need to get closer…” With a gentle tug, he slid me to the edge of the counter. A blaze of desire burned inside my chest, and I clenched involuntarily. He pushed my knees apart next, spreading my legs, and moved his hips between them.

His gaze skimmed my robe’s wide-open V for a second, and I didn’t even wonder what was showing. There wasn’t a damn thing under it and I wanted him to look. I wanted him to kiss me there. I wanted him to kiss me.

“Ready?” He put two of my fingers on his Adam’s apple. “Everything below here…on a curve from ear to ear.” Charlie flattened my palm over his collarbone. “That should help stabilize you a bit.”

 He tilted his head back, and his arms flexed at my sides as he leaned forward to balance his weight on his hands. My thighs were tight against his sides. He flinched when I moved closer, dipping his head down to lock eyes with me for second. There were only a few inches between our bodies. I could smell him again: sweat and woodsy deodorant. Charlie’s gaze continued down to my chest before he tipped his head back once more.

Whew. There was going to be a wet spot on this counter before this was over. “With the growth, right?” I asked, barely above a hoarse whisper. My stomach was flipping on a perpetual loop.

FAILURE TO LAUNCH THURSDAY TEASER:

“Um, Nik…we should walk away…” Denise's voice hit my ear and my tunnel vision cleared. The faces around me came into view. Oh, wow. This was a scene. And I was causing it, offering up ringside seats to our mess.

“Why don’t I ever get to have nice things?” Sydney yanked both Charlie and me into the kitchen. “Guys, take your VH1 reality show shit somewhere else. Please.”

HUGE TEASER TUESDAY!!!

My dear, dear friend, Shelley, who beta reads for me, loved this part of Failure to Launch, so I decided to share it with you.

This is Nikki's POV (I was a dual POV virgin until this story. Um, I hope it works out lol).  I really like the way Nikki is turning out. I'm drawn to people who are like, "Look at me and my mess. Take it or leave it," and she's this way. She really always puts herself out there...flaws, regrets, shame. She doesn't hide. She's so open about the good and bad, and it's been fun writing someone who often says exactly what they're thinking and how they feel. Anyway, hope you enjoy! I've been so MIA but I'm still here!! <3 <3

(UNEDITED TEASER)

“Whoa. I haven’t heard this in a while.” Instinctively, I grabbed his wrist. “Can you keep it here?” I turned the volume up on Kings of Leon.

Charlie raised his eyebrows, but his gaze was stuck on my hand. The warmth I’d felt earlier when he touched my back returned. “This song is always playing in my car and no one ever knows it. I’d believe you if you said you were really a fan,” he said.

It was definitely from before they got famous in America. “You know how when you first discover a band and they’re still playing mostly on college radio? You know they’re struggling to break out as artists, but it’s just so damn good. It’s urgent and anxious. It’s painful and passionate. It’s not mainstream radio-friendly. And you’re singing songs no one else really knows? I love that. It just feels like you own it. This was that album for me. It got me through a rough patch, when I was looking to connect with something, when I wanted a voice in my head that wasn’t my own.”

Somehow during my praise of the band his hand had slid into mine, and now our fingers were linked. It felt really good; it was comforting, the sensation of his palm. “From when you were in…rehab?” he asked.

I nodded then sighed. “So…how much do you want to know?”

“Anything you want to tell me, Nikki, which could be nothing at all. We did just meet a few hours ago.”

And maybe that was why I wanted to explain. But as I took in his kind smile, I hesitated. I never had before when talking about the mess I'd made of my life. And nothing about the way he was looking at me said he was trying to probe or guess what I was going to say. He was just…waiting. For me to talk, or not talk for that matter. It was sweet. Our entire day together he’d been like this. And I think I understood why. He loved stories because he loved people. So, speaking felt like a risk now because…he was something to lose?

What? I don’t even know him.

But I want to. And I want him to know me.

I took in a deep breath. This was normally the time when what I said broke my relationships with people. No matter what they’d thought about me before this moment, it was never the same after they found out about my biggest regret. But I still refused to close off or shut down or run away. The accident didn’t define me but it was as present as any tangible part of me. And I’d take rejection of all of me over acceptance of some persona I’d have to put on forever.

How to Fuck Up a Friendship

Happy Monday, everyone. Hope your weekend was awesome. I'm so behind on giveaway prizes and life in general because I'm marathon-writing right now. And I was reading Frenched by Melanie Harlow (awesome read, btw). But I plan to have my crap together this week.

So Failure to Launch is coming along pretty quickly. Much quicker than I anticipated, actually. Not sure what this means yet exactly in terms of release because I don't think I plan to do anything big, so maybe sooner rather than later? Maybe.

Anyway, I talked about how that picture of ballerina Misty Copeland inspired Nikki, the female protagonist's character, a while back. But I wanted to tell you a little about Charlie.

Charlie starts his own web series called "How to Fuck Up a Friendship" with his best friend (Sydney), where they play fictionalized version of themselves (Chuck and Syd), in a Larry David in Curb Your Enthusiasm kind of way, which he mentions in the story. And it gets really popular. I've been following the pretty cool rise of a popular web series called "The Misadventures of Awkward Black Girl (ABG)" for years now. It inspired a lot of what happens with Charlie and Sydney's web series (In ABG the creator/main character plays a fictonalized version of herself, too).

I really liked how open the creator has been about her struggles with getting it made without much financing, her Kickstarter campaign and then adjusting to its popularity. Charlie deals with a few of those things. Probably not as well as she does, though lol! Anyway, that's the lowdown on Charlie.

Wild Wednesday teaser for Failure to Launch