AFC's story goes as far back as Documentary, but Documentary felt safer at the time.

Eh. I don't want to be safe.

It took me a lot of soul-searching to make the decision to cool it with contemporary romance this year. But I am cooling it this year. Point blank, I'm not excited to write it right now. I'm not excited about reading my writing when I write it, right now. I want to clarify that this is personal to ME alone. I wanted to fall in love with my writing again this year. I wanted to read my own story and feel what I was hoping you'd feel, and writing romance just hasn't been doing it for me. Maybe I'm evolving, I don't know.

But there are so many people putting out very beautiful love stories right now (hello, Melody Grace) and I'm sitting here wanting to destroy things LOL (in my stories! in my stories!). So, contemporary romance is just not a place I feel like I can still write and be satisfied right now. I don't want to have to focus on the elements that people come to expect in contemporary romance.

AFC felt like a huge risk because I knew it was going to be a little uncomfortable for some and kinda violent and not exist in a black and white world of morality, and some people don't like that, but I want to write for the people whose Netflix recommendations are based of Sons of Anarchy.

I want to write uncomfortable things. I want to write people who do really bad things. I want to write stories that give me anxiety because something bad is going to happen or I'm unsure of how the characters will get out of something. I want to write things where my heart feels like it's going to jump out of my chest when I go back and re-read it. I want to write people with loose morals or none at all. I want to be horrible to my characters. I don't want to water down bad characters. I don't want likeability of characters to cloud how I want to write them.

Yeah, see? No romance here, which means Abel's story is backburnered (not a word at all LOL) for now. I'm sure some of you may be disappointed but I just can't do it. I don't want to write an uninspired story just because. I'm unmotivated to write it and until I am not, it won't happen.

But I do invite you to jump down the rabbit hole with me. It's going to be soooo fun. ;)

Idea behind A Fighting Chance

So some of you are reading or have read AFC already, so I don't mind sharing how the idea behind the story flourished. I had a thought for a plot and while I was researching, I came across this article...and fleshed out the story more. It went from there. And no, it's definitely not about dog fighting in this way, no worries:

http://fusion.net/justice/story/mexican-cartels-now-organizing-dog-fights-boxing-matches-18006

AFC teaser teaser teaser

I can't tell you enough how much I enjoyed writing the fight scenes. I went to You Tube and watched a few fights but ultimately most of the action just kind of sprung from my imagination. This whole sequence was so much fun to write, intense, but waaaay fun:

I stumble, almost crawling, to the corner and collapse against the chains. My ears are ringing, and I can smell the metal in my blood. Taste it, too. My head feels like Carlos is inside and trying to punch his way out.

“…stand here and watch him get beaten to death!” Drew is screaming at Miguel. They’re both frowning and sweating, and neither of them even notices I’m standing there. 

“I don’t want to, either, but what can we do, Drew? We can’t just yank him out of here and run!” Miguel yells back, looking more frustrated than angry.

“Guys, I’m okay,” I say with a mouth full of blood, and tingly pain courses down my jaw. Jesus, I hope it’s not broken. “Drew…” She looks at me, and defeat, despair, and abject terror, they’re all there in her face. “I got this…he’s going to draw it out because he wants me to suffer. It’ll hurt but I can rest here and there…”

“You won’t survive the fight. He’s trying to kill you. You know that, and he’s going to. I have to do something. How do we stop the goddamn fight, Miguel?”

AFC's not even out yet... but here's what's up next...

Fuel!!!

It'll be out sometime this year. Trying to slow down.

I've always wanted to a write a psychosexual thriller/romantic suspense plot. Basically...death. sex. crazy. guns. running. mystery.  lies.

It's definitely NOT new adult. Psychosexual stories tend to be loose on the morals and titillating, so if you're someone who likes for everyone to be good or bad and not good and bad, you'll hate it. I really, really don't like writing "heroes" because I think human nature is way too gray for that and Cameron is definitely no hero.

This isn't the blurb but I'll tell you about it:

Cordelia is an "independent contractor" in the drug world in Brazil. She delivers packages for anyone who asks and makes a pretty good living at it. She's skeptical of a new client that an old client recommends but she takes the job anyway. When she gets there, everyone's dead except for one guy who is hiding in a corner. His name's Cameron and he swears he didn't do it. She doesn't believe him, but they are forced to go on the run together when someone else shows up guns blazing. They don't trust each other and there's an attraction as well. So things get weird. Hopefully, I'll make you a wee bit uncomfortable by the end.

No, Fuel is not BDSM or anything close to that, despite what you see here. I'll leave those storylines to the pros. Cam and Cordy just like to push and play with each other. They're both crazy and a little dangerous. This is actually pretty tame for what I'm cooking up. WARNING: 18+ for stuff and unedited.

Cameron pulled the scarves between his hands until they were taut. “I want to use these.”

I shrugged. “You like control,”  I said. “It doesn't surprise me..."

He bound my wrists together and then knotted them to the headboard railing. “Don’t worry. It’s only kinky until it’s not….”

Straining against them, I lifted myself so that our chests were touching. And I snickered. Snorted, really. “You think you’re the first person to tie me up, Cameron? Look, I was fucking everybody weird before it went mainstream.” He chuckled as he tightened the binds.

“I saw you going through my bag… What were you looking for?” he asked.

Fuck. My heart raced but I kept my cool. “Oh, I see… so now you're gonna fuck answers out of me?”

He was fiddling with his pocketknife like he always did. "It's just to cut you free...later." He flicked the blade out and put his finger on my clavicle. His hand coasted down my chest, and I arched against it, all the way down to my bellybutton. “Why were you in my bag, Cordy?” he asked.

“Who are you...really?”

“Cameron Max.” Tossing the knife aside, he dropped to all fours above me.

“Interesting…that’s the only ID that wasn’t in there!” I laughed. “So, you gonna interrogate me or fuck me?”

“They’re not mutually exclusive, are they?” Cameron smirked as he cupped me under the knees and lifted my legs until I couldn’t see his face anymore.

“I hope not…” I whispered. Grinning, he pushed my knees back to meet my shoulders with his weight...

A Post of Unhelpful Things and Pinterest

I've been slacking on Pinterest but I'm putting together an inspiration board for AFC. I'm here --> http://www.pinterest.com/ajajajsand/ if Pinterest is your thing.

This is the table of contents for AFC. I'm really, really particular about chapter names reflecting chapters as a whole. They're so purposeful it's not even funny. I will read a chapter probably 4 times before I figure out the name. This is totally not helpful LOL but just like the names of tv show episodes they do provide clues... hmmm....

1 A Haunting

2 The Glorious Ones

3 The Past is Shrapnel to the Present

4 Wounds

5 No Puedo

6 Bite

7 Crazy

8 Things You Do For Family

9 What Do You See?

10 Hell is Empty and All the Devils Are Here

11 What’s Left of Us?

12 Debt

13 Pull

14 Devil’s Advocate

15 Of Monsters and Men

16 Daddy Issues

17 Redemption Song

1st 30 and 30 giveaway - Drew and Fable Forever by Monica Murphy

I'm turning 30 this year and I'm giving away 30 books! Woo!! It probably won't be thirty different titles, but thirty books will be given away!

1st 30 and 30 giveaway - Drew and Fable Forever by Monica Murphy. 2 copies, either on Kindle or Nook. Contest: runs for exactly 24 hours, and winners will have 24 hours to respond before I move on to someone.

Rafflecopter is down. So I'm just going to use random number generator based on the order of your entries...and get a little creative.

Facebook contest question: You just got your dream job offer, but the catch is you have to move there for the rest of your life. (It's a weird job and they need you forever, I don't know). What city or country will you be stuck in for eternity? And you HAVE to go and stay there, so don't try to get around my question, guys! 

NOTE: You MUST answer on Facebook!!

Hello!

So I hope everyone's new year is going well so far! So a quick rundown of things in the early part of 2014:

1- A Fighting Chance comes out in less than a month! Wow! Crazy! It's way different from the others. "Edgy" as some might say. I really hope you'll give it a "Chance" (LOL sorry, had to). Like I've said, I kinda need a break from the Contemporary Romance, especially because my interests are all over the place. Romantic Suspense and it's a little dark.

2 - So, I'm turning 30 this year. I don't even know where my 20's went but they were AMAZING and I'm so excited for Dirty Thirty. I haven't really done a BIG giveaway yet (at all), SOOOO in honor of getting older (gracefully lol) and because I love you guys for sticking it out through the good and bad, I'm doing an A.J.'s 30 and 30 giveaway. So, I'm giving out thirty ebooks this year! They'll be like surprise flash giveaways! Like 24 hours to enter kind of thing. INSANE, right? Yes. Because I can only exist at 0 or 10. This is 10 LOL.

3 - Lots of fun stuff. LOL.

Okay, enjoy your Thursday and weekend!!!

Happy New Year!

Happy New Year, everybody! I'm not really someone who reflects on the past because you can't undo anything, right? But I love fresh starts, even though I think we put way too much weight on the new year. A fresh start can happen on any day. No need to wait for Jan 1st. Anyway, I have resolutions and I have the same ones every year. I just try to go at them harder.

1. Be kind - Simple but it's easy to forget that everyone is fighting some kind of battle, and kindness can go a long way. I want to be an expert at making people in my life smile more. I want to listen and be a better friend.

2. Love hard - This has never been a problem. I love everybody, especially myself. LOL. Just saying. Maybe love MORE is a better resolution.

3. Volunteer with an organization I love - Truthfully, I've been busy, but this is my favorite thing to do.

4. Tell fear to go fuck itself - This one is my favorite because I learned about fear last year. I'm not the scared type. At all. "Bring it" is my motto. Writing opened up a WHOLE bunch of insecurities and uncertainties. If I have any regrets from last year, it's letting fear get the best of me. I saw a side of myself I didn't even know existed LOL. I didn't like it. And I'm over it.

So, here's to a renewal for all of us! Cheers!

Got resolutions?!